my heart is at home

so, i know that kathy and erin are both updating and kathy has been so good at doing all the functional updates about what we're actually doing...i wanted to take this time to give a little "heart-to-heart" about our time here.

i told Clair in an email recently that my heart feels at home here. He and I have been thinking a lot about coming here after our wedding to be missionaries. we were even offered a bit of a partnership with some missionaries here - it's very unofficial, but still a possibility. anyway, we've been praying fervently about that and i've been doing so b/c i definitely want what God wants more than what i want. the problem that i'm finding is whether or not waht God wants and what i want could be the same. i'm so afraid that i'm only hearing God say "yes" b/c that's what i want to hear. maybe He's saying no and all my imaginings are drowning Him out? well, Erin reminded me this morning that i may be only hearing Him say "yes" b/c he acutally IS. my, what a novel idea...so, please pray for discernment and that my eyes will always be on Him.

I've realized that so much of our time here has seemed kind of disconnected...i mean, i know we're here with purpose, but i'm still in the process of searching out God's heart, not just about coming here full time, but about the purpose of our time here. i'm begining to realize that our "because of ubuntu" blogname really is prophetic...(check out the post about what ubuntu means to understand a bit more about my thoughts)

anyway, i think that God is teaching me to see all people as family. i mean, just he other day i saw some people at church, random people that i don't know at all, and i was filled with such overwhelming compassion that it almost brought me to tears. it felt like the way it does when you see someone you love after a long absense...like it will feel to see my parents and future hubby at the airport in a month. i can't explain it, but Ugandans are my family and this beautiful, social, loving, culture is my home.

ugh! our time is short...i meant to write so much more, but this will have to do for now. feel free to post questions or comments - we appreciate them! i'll continue this thought at a later date...

sula bulungi :)